Living.

Apr 11, 2007

Lately I've been attempting to apply some of the things I should have applied a good while back, concerning defining myself as what I believe myself to be, while moving past labels, myths, and other generalized and possibly false info.

I had thought about the concept of some "mythical" creatures escaping onto the astral plane when the physical one became too dangerous for them because of, well, humans. A while later I saw something like this on American Dragon Jake Long (a cartoon on Disney about a dragon who protects the magickal creatures of NYC) where a herd of unicorns were galloping through Central Park and then disappeared through a portal that opened up out of nowhere. It illustrated the thought I had in my head; where some creatures may jump from realm to realm at will to carry out whatever task they had to accomplish. At the same time, some creatures may be stuck on the astral plane while some may be trapped here, either through inability to travel or through simple preference.

I have no real desire to physically transform into a gryphon. When I astral project, my astral body is of a gryphon, and it feels right enough for me. My human body is simply a shell and I feel no need for it to be altered in any way, especially if it's just to please my eyes... although I will need to get a bit more active if I don't want to die of the heart disease my ancestors blessed me with. All in all I do not consider it important to look like a gryphon in order to feel like a gryphon and to understand that I am a gryphon.

There may be some primal instincts from ancient lore that gryphons and I have in common (love of shinies, preference of meat, etc.) but like all creatures, some part of us has evolved and changed over the millenia. The one point I want to make: horses. It's a matter of opinion, but the one reason I have for not having negative feelings toward horses is because I don't associate them with the ancient enemy who were known for using them to get around (cyclopes, or probably any one-eyed greedy monsters, in body and/or spirit). That would be more along the lines of Humvees or Livejournals. As for creatures whom I associate with shallow intolerant jerks, unfortunately there have been quite a few of those who go under the name or guise of "wolf" and as a result I never really felt all that great about wolves. Someday I'll be able to get over that, through the cooperation of my big fleshy human brain and my understanding ethereal gryphon self.

I also personally believe that all the legends concerning gryphons and agates don't involve gryphons laying agate eggs, but instead collecting agate crystals and sticking them in their nests/aeries. It just makes more sense to me that way. The literature I had come across explaining the gryphons' use of agate talks about how they use them for their special properties; I collect crystals for the same reason. I lay them on top of things I want to charge with their energies, but not in the same manner in which I would lay an egg.

Maybe whoever thought the gryphon was laying a crystal egg was really just watching them pass a kidney stone. I dunno.

I've also been thinking about the exercises I've been working with that have to do with astral travel and mage work, specifically the one where you establish your personal safe house in the astral realm. I was told to visualize a door that had my magickal name written on it, then to walk through it and into a room which had a door for each of the 4 quarters, a throne, a screen on which I could watch anything, and whatever else I felt like decorating the room with. I couldn't keep the image of a stone brick room in my mind. I kept seeing a cave, with a big flat rock in the middle, a window looking out at a big forest, and four tunnels with the openings rimmed with colored stones. It felt more comfortable and natural to me rather than a cramped, conformed space built by a human.

Then there's the issue of "why am I a gryphon?" and lately I had a picture in my mind, dunno whether or not it was an actual vision, of a black space full of what looked like gryphons, all lying down asleep. A finger came down and tapped one of the sleeping gryphons on the forehead, and it was Awakened, by that finger's owner's will. The wizard Oberon Ravenheart wrote about souls as like water in a great basin, scooped up in clay cups with each cup being a physical manifestation or body of a person, and then falling back into the basin when each cup breaks, the body losing its soul substance through death. When the water ends up back in the basin, there's no telling what other body's soul it will mix with when it ends up in another cup.

Mar 23, 2007

I was watching some Pokemon movie earlier and I was thinking as the scene was looking down on some valley from high mountains... I never really think of the challenge of getting from one place to another, as long as I have a means of transportation.

When I finally learned to feel comfortable driving alone, day or night, I started going off on my own on days when I wasn't needed at the house; I'd go down to the park, or the magick/metaphysical store, or even the McDonalds, even though I really shouldn't be eating there, I need to get a good solid job so I can earn more $$ to eat at... Arby's, or someplace better. I'd go in town, or out of town... Maybe someday I'll be taking the interstate... but not today, heck no.

I was imagining standing up there on that mountain, looking across the valley and watching the sun rise. Then I looked down, and thought to myself, I bet some rabbit would be nice, and I just spread my wings out and leapt into the wind, and soon I was down there, and my only concern was catching the rabbit, and the danger of flying never crossed my mind.

So instead of worrying about getting someplace... It feels as though I should be concentrating on some higher aspiration.